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Emotionally stepping aside

Emotionally stepping aside
By Elizabeth Filips • Issue #13 • View online
Has this ever happened to you as a child? Your mum is furiously shouting at you, and then the phone rings. And within a few seconds she composes herself and answers with the sweetest tone to the person on the other side.
It’s funny as an adult. But more than that, it’s quite interesting. Because if you’d (dare) ask your mum right before the phone rang, she’d probably say she was blind with rage, that’s why she was allowing herself to lose her composure and shout.
And yet as soon as she had to, she switched to polite and calm.
So some part of her must’ve been calm, or able to be calm this whole time.
I’ve recently tried to apply this kind of thinking to my own emotions, especially the negative ones. I can feel I’m blindly sad, hurt, or angry. And yet, I can imagine how if my landlord suddenly knocked on the door I’d appear chirpy and polite.
And so why don’t I treat my own self a bit more in that way? That’s not to say I bury or ignore my emotions all the time, but whenever they seem all-consuming, I think of my mum answering the phone mid-argument. It’s not the whole of my that feels bad, it’s part of me that feels strongly so. And I can, to some extent, step aside and be OK. Until it eventually fades, sorts itself out, or I can reframe and properly understand what is going on.
Wishing you a great week,
Elizabeth xx

Quote of the week
“A society that’s well enough organised to defend itself is well enough organised to oppress itself.“ 
— Sebastian Junger
My Favourite Things This Week
Books - I’ve been reading The Soul of Money and The Art of Impossible this week. Both incredible. The first really gave me a new frame with which to view money, and the second feels like a summary of a lot of other books and papers on productivity. Would really recommend them.
YouTube Videos this week
I’ve still been unwell, so no videos out this week, or next as I have exams :/
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Elizabeth Filips

Hiya, I'm Elizabeth, a medical student, artist and YouTuber in London. Every Sunday I write about exploring meaning, productivity, little pleasures and just navigating life. And some of my favourite things that week.

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